Manjaros, Glasgow
Jack of All trades, master of none, this time old adage popped into my head when I heard that Manjaros was opening its first Scottish outpost at the Springfield Quay.
Manjaros style themselves as African and Caribean fusion food and a Pizzeria, I decided to check out this exotic African Caribean fusion cuisine with the Foodwala family.
We were salivating at the prospect of eating some Jamaican Goat curry and the sublimely spiced Jerk Chicken and my favourite Trinidadian Saltfish fritters.
Having cut my Caribbean food teeth at Pandaberie in Notting Hill and Ting Irie in Dubai my palette was going to Calypso with the Jerk Spices.
All this anticipation came to a screeching stop, It was like a scene from a Wes Anderson movie dream sequence, where the character is walking along a secluded hot sunny Caribean beach with Bob Marley playing in the background and a cocktail in hand and all of a sudden you wake up to a freezing cold Glasgow evening with euro pop playing on the radio.
We kicked off the proceedings with the exotically sounding Lamb Flambe Chops which according to the menu should have been marinated with a blend of Majaros spices and topped with their signature sauce, in reality, we got these emaciated lamb chops which were cooked a few days ago and a nondescript sauce was poured onto them.
There was no redeemable flavour to them.
We received these sorry looking Chicken Goujons, the side salad was flacid and wilting after spending time under the hot lamp, yet again the chicken pieces were pre-cooked somewhere down south and reheated in the kitchen, the chicken was stringy and crunchy.
Believe it or not, the KFC down the road did better Chicken strips with more flavour and at the fraction of the price.
The Chicken wings were described on the menu as succulent, I was hoping they would be like the fabulous wings from Wingerz on Sauchiehall Street, however, they were anything but, firstly they were double-jointed wings, my pet peeve, secondly, they were so dry that even the sauce was embarrassed to be associated with the wings.
Next Up was the Manjaros Signature Mix Grill Platter, It was the same Lamb Chops, Chicken wings as earlier but with chicken and lamb skewers. We got some cubed chicken and lamb with no tell tale signs of them ever being anywhere near a charcoal grill.
The supposedly flame grilled platter was to be accompanied with a special Manjaros Spice sauce, we received a greasy gloopy sauce with the same flavour by pass.
The mashed potato was the worst I ever had, it was cold and lumpy and I suspect came from a packet.
The Cajun Chicken Wrap was again a flavourless fillet of Chicken in a grilled Pitta, the salad was again wilted and the rice was cold.
The Chicken Rasta Rice was a refugee from Uncle Ben, I sound like a broken record, but my frustration was reaching a peak, all the food was uniform in its blandness.
In Conclusion, Manjaros has many branches in England, however, the food in this one was absolutely forgettable, although they were busy, the customers were eating without joy, there was no conversation or signs of families enjoying breaking bread here, they were eating and leaving.
The Service was harassed and inexperienced, the poor staff were running about without direction.
The food came out in dribs and dabs and was lukewarm at best when it did come out.
My Heart sank when I heard the distant ping of the microwave oven in the kitchen, so much for the flame grill.
Halal – Yes
Food –4 out of 10
Atmosphere – 6 out of 10
service – 4 out of 10
Cleanliness – 6 out of 10
Total score – 20 out of 40